recorded by a soul swallowed in scoured cathedrals

the lights were always down
no signal in drugchoked air, we shatter
furious highs, we shatter
piano strings by a stage of electric
loving carelessly was not
a passive decision

the lights were always down
ragged-eyed we
the hallucinogeneration
tear miserable hair in
manic-fuelled ecstasy / ecstasy-fuelled mania
panic in bloodied dancing shoes

the lights were always down
stagger to the deadboys with marijuana
the star kissers bid goodbye
cynicism is a dancing girl
she laughs too much
and it doesn't reach her eyes

the lights were always down
driftwood is a shitty lifeboat, turns out
cinematic vista spirals into closeclosecloseness--
kaleidoscope and cocaine, but
if you were a bad habit
you'd be cigarettes and cities, quiet deaths

the lights were always down
i lie down at the shrine worshipped
by infidels and the nightmarish
we would be window silhouettes
if only we had windows, but we lie
in fields and bitten lips

the lights were always down
we are underworld royalty
androgynous i flatline into ellipses:
i faultline into metalepsis
think of the downtown widow in eyeliner
to the beat of a bassline that never fades

the lights were always down
convince ourselves we're black&white moviestars
chaste kisses are for the weak, what
endeavour can this be--
i am gold and blue, but they
are blue and gold

the lights were always down
ferris wheel is a tidal arch and dizzy, we
run from its shadow, forests
full of addicts and the spit of
mouths that have never known each other
dine and dash, wash your coffee cup as penitence

the lights were always down
the battery could run low-- we move
in the dark, and never complain
haul ourselves up out out out
in a palsy of kinetic frenetic fanaticism
frantic dreams, these places are nomadic new yorks

the lights were always down
pupils expanded but we stopped guessing
whether it was powderpills or light exposure
or both, nobody comes here for music she said
a surging crowd in the distance - foreground
is a girl and a bottle and a girl again

the lights were always down
this was my unbecoming, the unbirth
of a thousand children, catastrophic collision of
a hole in your chest filled with
white powder and rock songs
it takes a lot of alcohol to get drunk enough to pray

the lights were always down
sleepless red-eyed tumble of toxic typists
inexplicable scraped knees, wasted intellectuals
lie back with lids snapped shut
pondering small town prejudice
and other things they will not remember in sobriety

the lights were always down
not-so-innocent bystanders we plead
anti-capitalist would-be anarchist
skeletons meet other skeletons
in silver caravans gleaming with abuse
and the roar of burned ash-scattered poetry never spoken

the lights were always down
narcotic haze machines scream alleluia
rocks become dust become moon
we slide down neon festival fire escapes singing
grey limbo is a satellite paradise;
carousel crew predicts war

the lights were always down
the carousel crew were right, but not sober
the sand dune girls were indians&nomads&saints
we are a set of regurgitated beliefs
and vomited-up heartbeats midnight-moaning
poor at clean breaks, heart-wreckers

the lights were always down
and so it goes on, and so, and so, and so
carrion meat and vultures become friends
cockroach blindness sends shudder
through spinal cord of country's
mountainous motorway backbone

the lights were always down
engine rev-rev-revving surreal
clean citalopram replaces.
pick the phones back up, shiver under
throes of daylight
the lights flicker on.